May 30, 2010 by Nicole
It is interesting to me how deeply fear of loss can affect me. After my husband, my second biggest love is my puppy pack. Well, with the exception of my 79# lab who is three years old, the other three members of my extended family are three old gals getting on in years. Two of them have been with me for 9 years, and in that time, they have become like my children. Last night, one of them became very ill–most likely because of something that she ate which didn’t agree with her. It was a horrible feeling to see her feeling so lethargic and “out of it.”
Of my four dogs, she has been with me the longest, and the two of us have a very profound bond. She always wants to be near me, and she always comforts me in a way that very few others can. What is probably most difficult about seeing her not feeling well is knowing that at 9 years old, she’s not going to be with me in a few years. She’s in very good health now, but it’s very difficult to imagine life without her. She got me through so many of the dark times of my depression and helped me fall asleep one those nights when the racing thoughts were difficult to quiet. Over the last few years struggling with my illness, she’s worked better than any therapy one could possibly want, and I always have felt so blessed to have her, and she’s also one of God’s best answers to prayer.